my husband and i used to have everything, money, fame, love, respect, understanding...

recently we had a problem financially, plus he said he wanted to be FREE that he can go out whenever he want wherever he want to go without letting me know.. i mean.. i am sure we don't have 3rd party issue on both side.. but he just can't let go of his "youth" days.. he still want to stay on streets specially during night 'till morn with his friends, and just leave me at home every night alone.. (just to clear things out our home is located in a town wherein we don't have much neighbors and had farm lot on back and side of the house (rice farm for instance..)and we don't have much security at home since we only use the standard door knob. For short you can really never call it SAFE to live with) that's why i always argue with him and usually asked him to stay that instead of going out i asked him to just watch a movie with me or even make love with me. he usually disagree and still do what he want.

We're living separately from our parents but we're definitely near his side.. everyone around us is their relatives. while me? i'm an hour and half away from home. left everything behind since the day i've been married.. no friends, no relatives, and my family? i rarely even see/visit them. that is because i'm far from them and my husband usually just want to hang out somewhere else than my parents place. although He's definitely welcome to our family and he's definitely comfortable whenever where at my parents house. 

as i can say our family is wealthy while his isn't.. when we get married he's working in a fine company as a regular employee and my parents provide us business with great income. so he decided to just resign from work and help me out in our little business..  he don't literally help me.. but he's there when i needed companion and help.

Whenever we have fights he usually get out of the house, and recently he won't come back and will just sleep at his parents house without informing me that he's not coming back. so i keep waiting and waiting for him and pleading for him to go home. i also asked his mom for her to sent him home so that we can talk things out. but she and he never really listen. he usually tell his mom everything we argued.. and his mom usually have his side (of course) he did this to me not just once but lots of times already and i felt like i'm beginning to get crazy waiting for nothing.. so i decided to went home to my parents house.. still keeping my mouth shut and not telling them what happened.. i just made an excuse for them to let me stay without them looking bad after my husband. i still tried to pretend that everything's okay between us.

as i still try to make things work.. i still contact him 'till now and still pleaded for us to work things out.. but this time i am certain that i don't ever wanna go back to the house that we're renting and that for us to just stay near my parents for a change.. still he wishes and choose to be hard on his state to live free..

and now that he broke up with me, and me getting all my stuffs at our house.. he started to get mad at me and says that i am just getting everything and it doesn't make him happy.. and that i am getting everything i provided and gave him. despite of me explaining to him that he's the one who broke up with me, he's the one who said that he wanted to be FREE as single.

we had pre-nuptial agreement way back and he's not really after our properties. he's just after some stuffs like car, computer, some childish stuffs honestly... but i choose to take everything away for him to realize my worth. for him to realize that he's happy with me and the stuffs we have together.. and me still begging for me to work things out..

am i really a bad wife?