I have found in my own experience that if you and your wife are close and usually discuss everything and now she is hiding part of herself from you - its not good.  She may not have crossed the line, but just the fact she didn't tell you is a red flag.  I have a phrase that runs through my head when I am looking at my own actions...."Those who have nothing to hide, hide nothing".   

Emails, facebook, text messages - they are all so dangerous when it comes to relationships.  For some reason, perfectly logical people lose their minds when they are behind an electronic devise!

I totally agree with this!! I don't know why people tend to think that just b/c something is done over text or emails that they cannot be found out.

Anyway, to answer your question Greg, no you are not reading too much into this! She is a married woman and getting together with her ex to "talk" is ridiculous. And the fact that she didn't tell you about it proves that she didn't want you to know which is definitely not a good sign. There is something going on and you need to find out what it is...maybe it was innocent in the fact that all they did was talk. But what did they talk about? You...your marriage? If that's the fact, then that is not good either b/c she is going to her ex for advice or to vent. And what will he tell her? Probably not "Stick it out and fix your marriage." Well, there's probably a very small chance that's what he said, but I wouldn't take it to the bank.

So, what you need to do is create a safe environment for the two of you to talk. What I mean is, do it in a place that both of you feel comfortable and when you ask her what happened DO NOT get upset at her answer (if it's not what you want to hear). You need to stay calm and listen. The first negative reaction you give will make her shut down and will be likely that she will not want to tell you anything else. So, give her permission to tell the truth. But, be careful of the questions you ask and be prepared for her answers b/c once she tells you, she cannot untell you.

If it is something other than talking, you might want to look into attending a LovePath 911 workshop. You can get more information about it by clicking the link at the top of the page. I really think that it will benefit your marriage if you attend.