I've been married for 6 years, been together for 11 years. We have a 10 year old and a 5 month old. Nearly two years ago my mother died suddenly of heart attack. Four months later my father, who had AD and was in a nursing home for 10 years, died. This past week my husband's mother passed away. In the meantime, my husband is on medication for anxiety which began a few months before my mother passed. His anxiety is not related to any of the greif we've had, it was there beforehand.

After my parents passed there was much drama from my siblings. I feel like I worked really hard at maintaining a marriage throughout. I feel like even before my mother-in-law passed, my husband had already shut down. We've made love twice since we had the baby 5 months ago. He is still affectionate but not as much as usual, and unlike me, isn 't looking for lots of hugs for comfort which is unsettling. Conversation is one-sided. If I initiate conversation, he makes it into a joke. I try to discuss a lot of little things with him that hurt me and he just listens but doesn't comment or change. I feel lonely and shut out.

I feel increasingly frustrated, neglected and taken for granted. We couldn't afford nor had time from his work for a vacation this summer but he had two 4-day weekends. He decided to spend BOTH of those at home despite I needed to get away from all the stress (suggested camping which is cheap). A little compromise would've been nice, but there wasn't any, and it often being like this is making me extremely resentful. I feel like my needs are completely ignored despite what I tell him. He will only change something if it benefits him or our daughter, which is fine, but he won't do it to make me happy. The last time we had sex he orgasmed and went to sleep, I did not orgasm and he just left me hanging.  He could've done other things to make me feel good but he just went to sleep. That really hurt.

This past Mother's day I was a mother of a newborn again, and he completely ignored Mother's day. We took his father out to eat with us before visiting his mother in the home. Going out for lunch was kind of my suggestion only because his father asked what we were doing (wanted a ride to see his wife) and I said what we usually do for special occasions. But turns out, my husband had no plans. He's forgotten special occasions in the past, like my birthdays too. He thinks the idea of "date nigths" are dumb, either says we have no money or no time....if he doesn't need it, he doesn't seem to realize that I do.

 He seems to be completely comfortable in this marriage without thnking it's something a couple works at. When I tell him I'm unhappy he does nothing, just says I love you, which is getting old to hear when I'm still feeling the same way. I think he's in total denial that I'm unhappy, which i've told him point-blank. I still love him but I'm lonely, sexually frustrated and exhausted.

Ive asked him if he's mad at me because he seems to be acting passive aggressive but he says no. He keeps hurting me but on the other hand telling me he loves me and i don't know what to do. I can't help it but cry sometimes and he doesn't even notice how bad I really feel. I don't think he takes me seriously when I tell him my feelings.