I've been married for 28 years, and have 3 wonderful sons, 16, 18, and 22.

My husband is a wonderful man in every way, except as a husband.  No, he's not abusive.   I am his best friend, and I enjoy talking to him about work and kids, or anything else.  He is a homebody who likes to do things around the house...as do I, but not to the exclusion of everything else.  For his "midlife crisis" he bought a tractor.  He loves using it around the 3+ acres.

My problem is that I am never a priority.  We never do anything together, or if I insist, he'll come and make me miserable by acting like a spoiled kid who was dragged somewhere by his mother.

We've had rough patches that have all stemmed from the same issue.  We went to marriage counseling for about 5 months (over 10 years ago) and nothing changed.  Only me, who apparently decided I wasn't worth requiring him to step up and notice me.  I've tried to get him to go again a few times since then, and he refuses.  Says it's my problem...he's perfectly happy.  Sure he is, because he always gets his way.

I go and do whatever I want...within reason.  Lunches with friends, movies, girls night out and such.  He loves it because it gets him off the hook to go anywhere.  I visit my parents (across the country) three times a year.

I would love for us to have some sort of connection.  I can count on one hand the number of times we've had sex in the last 2 years.  It doesn't bother him.

We are both overweight, and I try to get him to walk or eat right and he refuses.  He will only eat what he wants, and I get the "look" if I actually add a vegetable to the meal.  Of course he won't eat anything healthy, which makes it hard for me. 

I am feeling like my life is passing me by, and I have a limited time left on this earth.  Would I be happier without him?  I don't know how I would ever support myself.  I'm a smart woman, but haven't worked outside the home in a long time.  What would happen to my sons relationship with me?  He's probably a better father than I am a mother, so he would likely have their support.

Sometimes I think I'm just waiting for the end.