My name is Danny and I due to my own stupidity I am now without the most amazing woman I have ever known. We have known each other for 10 and1/2 years, been married for 8 years. It has had many obstacles along the way, but when we are connected there is nothing more amazing. I am a victim of my own peril. I got sucked in and ensnared by the world of on-line profiles and porn. I even had an affair 2 years ago with my first wife. My wife stood strong through all of that, that is until the 2ND of September. She packed up and was out while I was out at a job interview. She is now staying with members of her family and will not speak to me at all. I am completely shut out.
       I was in shock for about a week, went through a terrible bout with my bipolar, but then realized it's time for action, drastic action. I have gone through and deleted every single profile I had, blocked all access to any porn. Sorted through all my email contacts and deleted anyone or anything that could in any way tempt me back into that crap. I woke up!!! I have turned back to God and am doing my all to give myself completely and truly to Him. I am on a med for bipolar now. I set up a new Facebook account to get me away from all those who could pull me back. I have sent her log in info for every email account, as well as any other accounts I have on line. I want her to know that I am trying to clean myself up. I want her to know that I have nothing to hide and want her to check behind me to see that.
      Our marriage was great at first, but sometime along the way I fell into a downward spiral with depression and instead of turning to her and to the Lord, I turned to this fantasy world that is killing more marriages than the plague. I ignored her trials at helping me, at loving me. We eventually were arguing and fighting pretty much every day or at least every other. The fights got worse and worse each time. I wouldn't put my hands on her, but I might as well have been. I am 5'10, 205lbs, she is 5'1, 112lbs. I am an ex Navy Seal, she has M.S. My knowledge and intimidation factor wear so threatening that she would hide in the bathroom between the tub and the toilet. I was horribly verbally abusive as well as emotionally. I was, for lack of a better word, a monster.
     Like I said, I am on meds now, and am talking with several counselors. I am all about making me better, being the absolute best man I can be. I can not continue like this, nor expect her to ever want to be a part of a life that continues in such chaos and disrespect.