My husband and I went to the LovePath 911 workshop last weekend and it was so good for us....  I can't say it was easy - far from it - but it helped us so much.  Not just in understanding why I had an affair, but in giving us great hope in moving past the affair. 

I, too, was horrified I had an affair.  After 20+ years of marriage I thought I was immune....  it happened and it was traumatizing to our marriage, but the workshop helped us see that our marriage can get back on the right track and be stronger than ever.... 

Good luck to you and your marriage!

Well, because of other obligations we were unable to go in July....  We are now going to go this weekend.  I am dreading it more than I think I have ever dreaded anything in my life.  I was all set and ready to go last month, but now - I'm not so sure.....  I won't back out - it was hard enough convincing him we NEEDED this.  But, by putting it off, I fell into old habits.  Man, this is SO hard....

No.... but I do have problems with what he perceives as initiating and what I consider initiating.  For some reason, he doesn't see me cleaning the house as foreplay - but for me, when he cleans it, it always works.  I have to actually grab a hold of something or put something in my mouth for him to actually get where I'm going....

I really feel for you... in our case it is me that had the affair.  Before it happened, for the first 23 years of our marriage, every month on the 17th my husband would send me a card, or leave a note on the mirror or in my lunch... Since then he has continued to do those little things, but I don't feel the same about it.  I feel like I "ruined" it and have a hard time feeling proud of our marriage.  Your wife may feel the same way.  We have enrolled in a lovepath workshop and I am hoping to work through my guilt feelings there....  The idea of renewing your vows is an excellent one!  Our 25th is coming up - maybe we will do the same and finally put all this behind us.

Well, I have signed up for a LovePath 911 workshop....  I am scared, I am having a hardtime not talking to the other man, I feel as if weight of the world is on my shoulders...  It has been so hard to come to the decision to end the affair, but I want to give my marriage a fighting chance.  Please continue to pray for me and my husband.

Man, you are not kidding about the devil... 

I am the major breadwinner in our family - I make about 4 times what my husband does between my 2 jobs - and the opportunities to replace my job are few.  I have talked to my husband about selling our house and reducing our debt so that I will have an easier time making ends meet, but he is totally against it.  He says that my infidelity is my problem and I shouldn't punish our children by making them change homes and schools.  I know if I threatened to leave he would change his tune, but I feel I have hurt him enough without making idle threats.   But, work then becomes my happy place where my (What? - boyfriend sounds so childish, lover too trashy, can I just say heart?) heart is.... 

What a mess!!!  I feel like I am being slowly pulled under...

Pray for me. 

I know all the things I should do - end the affair, quit my job, attend a workshop, come clean with my husband  (who knows all about it, but thinks it ended).  I just can't do it by myself. 

So, please pray for me....

Wow!

This is the first time in over a year I feel God is guiding me, instead of just watching me with disappointment.  I didn't know this forum existed until this morning when I was on my way to work.  I was listening to the radio and - lo and behold - Joe Beam was slated to be on!  Years ago we attended the N. Augusta C of C and I recognized the name.  He hadn't come on the radio before I got to work, so I went to the radio website, and that led me here.

I am 44 years old, have been married 23 years, and have been having an affair the last year and a half. It started off as a harmless "secret admirer" email sent by a coworker.  Satan always seems harmless at first.  Emailing soon led to flirting.  Flirting led to meeting; meeting to a full-blown affair.   Satan had set his trap well - My husband and I started having financial problems at the same time the flirting started.  By the time it had grown into an affair, I had taken an extra part-time weekend job that was supposed to be on Saturdays, but only Sunday shifts were available.  How I resented my husband!  Even though the solution was ours together, I resented working 6 days a week.  But, secretly, I was also relieved to not have to to go to church and face my Christian brothers and sisters every week.

My husband is a good and Godly man who truly honors me as his wife and the mother of our children - my mistakes are my own.  I own that, but up until today didn't see any hope that there was life after....  I am in love with the man I am having the affair with, but I want to be in love with my husband again. 

Please be patient with me.   As I read the insightful comments and slog through this jungle of lies I have trapped myself in, I hope to work up the courage to end all this.  This is a baby-step for me, a ray of hope that someday my life and soul will be back on track.