I usually cannot orgasm during intercourse with my husband but if he fingers me or we use toys I can orgasm. I tell him this is no fault of his that I can't orgasm during intercourse but he still thinks it is his fault and that he cannot perform well.   Sex with him is wonderful and I make sure I am vocal during it to let him know. How can I make him realize it is just me that has a difficult time orgasming during intercourse. He doesn't see it as part ofthe sex when we use toys or such. He thinks he is just helping me masturbate but I see it as continution of our lovemaking. He doesn't believe me. I just want him to realize it is not him that has the provblem and that helping me get off without using
his penis is still part of the lovemaking. Any suggestions?

A lot of women require clitoral stimulation.   He should educate.himself this.  If it doesn't bother you, make it  cleqr to him.   I am the same way and I love sex with my husband.   

There is an alignment technique you can try too, but I gave up on it personally.  I am happy the way I work and enjoy intercourse just fine.

not sure if its the clitoral stimulation.  you said when he fingers you.  is he performing CS when he's fingering you or can you orgasm with just fingering.  if he is using CS then I would recommend using positions where you can  control the friction.  my wife will grind on top of me when Im not getting it done.

Try changing your sex position for more stimulation..

Statically speaking only one percent of women orgasm with out clitoral or G spot stimulation so your issue is actually quite common.  Since your desire seems to be to have an orgasm from him with out use of toys or outside stimulus from reading your post. I 'd suggest trying a few positions that will place his penis in more direct contact with your clitoris. You can control this very easily with out him feeling like your trying to direct sex, as a blow to his ego at this point can back fire and completely leave him feeling emasculated.  And when that happens it lowers a man's libido quite dramatically and can take a long time to recover.  1) In the classic missionary position arch your back and lower your vaginal area that will allow him to enter you from a downward thrusting angle and allow the length of the penis to rub back and forth on your clitoris.  2)another easy variation on missionary is to put your legs together and have him enter you with his legs straddling yours.  This will also create a long tight love tunnel effect for him and has the same effect of him directly rubbing along the clitoris.  Sometimes it is easier to have him enter you first then transition to this pose.  I hope this helps.