have you forgiven yourself?
what have you done to combat your addiction? im not judging you ( i fight with it all the time)
what about the addiction did she find repulsive or upsetting? like the fact that you liked certain fetishes that are to her not normal? is she very religious? did she feel that you weren't giving her the time she felt she deserved?

every morning we thank G-d that he gave us life, but we also say that He has much faith, but who does He have faith in (good q, eh?)
the Rabbis suggest that He has faith in us, that we will do the right thing and be good people.

remember even though we do not such super great things, G-d still gives us life and all the enjoyments it comes with, since He is waiting for to be better. so give yourself a break :) give your wife what she needs and act the way she did when you first dated her and she (fell in love with you) pm me if you want to keep chating