Question for those out on dealing with children after an affair has happened. My husband had a one time affair years ago but kept it hidden for over six years until four years ago when it all came out (after I thought I was going crazy). Any way we have four children together and yes they also heard what had happened. Then they were ages 11-20. The then 13yr old girl (now 17 senior in high school) was devastated thinking we were going to divorce but we hung in there and still hanging with other issues the kids have no idea about my husbands issues( and prob don’t want to know)  but question is on her as when ever anything happens that my I get upset with my husband on even if it is a small thing and I just make a loving correction she hops to taking up for him. I get the distinct feeling she thinks I should not get upset with him, raise my voice or anything similar etc….. And I don’t get it. I feel she maybe blames me for what happened? He basically abandoned the family for over eight years, mentally and def spiritually absent. He still has issues that the kids don’t know about that he is in counseling presently for but I don’t get why she is determined to take up for him at all costs in fact it hurts me but  I keep my mouth shut as I am not about  to hurt her or drag her into anything further. Any thoughts or suggestions?