I have been married for 8 years to a man who is an alcoholic, but has stoped drinking and for the past 3 to 4 years has watched progressively more violent porn. I was raped years ago with GHB, left for deadroom and 2 months in a comma. Husband knows about this and it has never caused an issue in the bed room untill I found his search history on our family PC. It started with bondage and spanking, it only bothered me because he hides it (not well) and refuses to discuss it with me. We have also had a problem with him trying to undress me as I sleep.. Normaly I wouldn't mind him trying to wake me up, but when I start to stir he stop moving, I noticed he does this when I have wine or when I have taken meds. This last time, he woke me up twice and I just shoved him away and said let me sleep.  The third time he tried, I must have been in a terrible dream and it woke me terrified and shaking, he offered to sleep on the couch so he wouldnt bother me. The ne,t day he asked how he got to the couch... So I told him. He says he has no recollection of what happened. I gave him the benefit of the doubt but was still not understanding how this only happens when I have had some thing to aide my sleep. So heres the big one. Yesterday he left his phone at home by accident, our 5 year old daughter was playing angry birds on it, I checked his google search. See normaly he erases his Web history, well here is a list of what I found and being been assulted in the past. Over the counter knock out drops, knock out drops, victim porn, forced sleep sex, brutal sex, hardcore sex forcex, rape vids, forced fu$&,pasted out porn, rerape,, she wont know. I'm tryinv to do my best not to think like a victim right now, but how any man could be attracted to a woman who is unconscious or not willing is a huge issue with me. I confronted husband last night, anx said we have an appt with a marriage counselor tomorrow @ 6, he better show up or I am leaving. He still swears he is not conscious for the night episodes... Anx his reason for watching porn like that is its different and its about control since I wont sleep with him as much as he wants and he has needs. He also said it would be normal for any guy to look at this type of porn . I'm the one with the issue with it becauze of my past. I need as much advice as I can get, have told none of my friends and not even told the conseler as of yet. I have no issues with porn as long as you dont hide it. My husband says he is embarrassed about what I found, but offered no comfort or apology for once again hiding porn. He says I'm blowing it out of proportion and he wont go to the appt at 6tonight. 

It is a possibility that people are reading your post and don't know what to say.  I myself don't know what to tell you either.  I am praying for you right now that the Lord will give you strength and wisdom through all of this.  :(

I think maybe he was attracted to your experience in some weird messed up way. I know that sounds horrible but weird fetishes are normally triggered from somewhere and maybe it sparked something in him? Does he have a decent past? Maybe he has some personal counseling he needs.

I had to register only to reply to you, he probably has mental status that is called Sleepomania , or Sleeping Sex Disorder , Well known sexual disorder, but it is not dangerous (scientist didn't find any evidence that the men under this state is willed to endanger any person). It is probably that after your negative experience that you had , didn't had too much will to "be" with him (if you know what I mean ) so he is trying to blow it out of his system. Why he watch rape, because he is probably really depressed , but it really does not have to mean that he will initial that kind of act over you or anybody else. The best solution for this is "open marriage" , or you should force yourself to help your husband. You should have a different kind of sex, involving maybe costumes or something like that and tell him to go to gym or sth like that to blow his hormones, because they could be pesky little things. Hope this helps.
If you have any questions , please write me an p.m.
 

I think you need marital counsel and he also would benefit from seeing his own therapist. Those acts that he is attracted to would bother A woman who was raped or abused as well as someone whom has never had that awful experience.