So I sit here alone. Left my wife 2 months ago. I'm truely trying to figure out what went wrong. Here is my story.
I left cause I had a melt down. My 10+ years of medication stopped working for me. Last July I started having panic attacks followed up with depression. My wife understands but doesn't. She has never felt with depression and anxiety in her entire life. She is an extremely strong person. I was convinced my anxiety and depression were being caused by my life being out of balance. I was 10 hours away from my close knit family and I felt that I needed to go back to them. That living so far away was causing my pain. In a matter of a few months I became miserable. Trying different meds, therapy and self reflection. I became so confused and felt so alone. So I ran. I moved back to my home town at the end of jan. my wife is unwilling to move. I am at constant battles with my own thoughts and feelings. I love her, of course. Did we have our areas to work on, absolutely. I'm not feeling the relief I thought I would by moving back. I love my family, and I did miss them terribly, but is it worth losing my wife over it?
So I sit here alone, asking myself, what the hell did i do?