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Hello, I’m a married woman and I’m falling in love with another man. I know it’s wrong but it seems like I just can’t stop thinking about him. I know I’m lacking attention and affection from my husband but I do love him but I’m falling for someone else that really make me feel loved. Please help me!! Thanks.
Take a look at some of our articles pertaining to limerence!
Don’t do it… you will regret it….
My wife is saying things like, each relationship is different. My sexual experience with my lover is different than the one with you. Does that me she is saying I am bad in bed sexually?
I recently found out that my wife of over 20 years has been carrying on an affair with her boss for at least 3-4 years. It was emotional to begin with and sexual for about a year. I had no idea there were any significant problems in our marriage. We were both extremely involved in our church as well as in many other faith-based organizations. I’m certain many people viewed us as the couple who had it all together. Needless to say, that all came crashing down when I found out what was going on. To make matters worse, my teenage daughters were the ones who discovered this and told me. To make matters even worse, my wife brought this man and his wife (yes, his wife) more and more into my family’s life over the course of this affair to the point where we have been with them pretty much every weekend and often multiple times per week. We also went to church together and served on church committees together. I’ve listened to a lot of your information on limerence, and it has helped me understand what happened. What I don’t understand is why I should take her back? The kids are devastated by what their mother has done. I am devastated. I know, and she has even stated, that I never did anything to deserve this. Parts of me want restoration, but parts of me think I’d have to be a fool to take her back after what she did. Adultery is even given in the Bible as the reason to permit divorce. She is ashamed and claims to be committed to work on our relationship. She says the affair is over, and it seems as though it is, though I can’t know for sure. However, even now she won’t commit to forever. I want to do the right thing. My life is full of doing the right thing even when it’s hard. I volunteer countless hours. I’ve given up pretty much every hobby and social activity outside of family activities. I’ve tried my best to do everything for this woman to make her happy, and she went a humiliated me and my daughters. I know I’m commanded to forgive her, and I hope that someday I can fully do that. My question is “why should I stay married to this woman?” I never thought she was capable of something like this. Now I know she is. I deserve better than this.
I am so sorry that you are all going through this.. We know how painful it is for everyone involved..
I wish I had an answer for your question but I don’t..
That is a question you will have to answer for yourself.. We can’t make that choice for you or even tell you why you should.. It’s something you are going to have to decide you want to do.. If you choose to stand for your marriage and fight for it, we can help you tremendously.
We at Marriage Helper are covering you all in prayers.
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